'Pat is the only one of my friends who
is an 18th-century roue. Despite what
people say about Pat's lack of "life-
skills", what he really lacks is "dying-
with-dignity" skills; instead he opts
for the "drink oneself to near-death
and then resolve to turn over a new
leaf with a transparent lack of
commitment" skill set. Pat is
surprisingly intelligent given the
prolific amount of booze and drugs he
has taken over his life. Which is to
say, he is mildly retarded. I have
known Pat for fourteen years, and at
the beginning he would play the
vicious, intolerant bigot to my
verminiferous Gollum. Now, he plays the
vicious, intolerant bigot to my
vicious, intolerant bigot. I'm amazed
we've stayed friends despite our
multiple attempts to derail that
friendship. By the way, Pat will die of
Hodgkin's disease.' --Bobcat, 2004
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